Slip N' Slide

I adore the mornings when you utilize the underside of my stiffening resolve as your own personal slip and slide. When ready you run yourself up that flag pole and I salute you with caresses until you descend upon my glazed hairy matted cradle.

TMI Tuesday: September 18, 2018

Munchausen 

Welcome to sexy fun and playfulness at TMI Tuesday.

1. Which animal listed below represents your true sexual self?
a. Chipmunk – cute and cuddly

b. Monkey – all about being mischievousness. I think we are all monkeys on this bus

c. Tiger – I’ve earned my stripes

2. Your partner is in the mood for sexy fun and you are tired – what do you do?
a. Start snoring. There is no way I’m giving it up tonight.

b. Trade. You give me a massage… and we will see… Or just have a 68 session. You do me and I'll owe you one.

c. That would never happen!

3. Which of these sexual descriptive labels closely matches you?
a. Dominant
b. Submissive
c. Top
d. Bottom

e. Switch. Definitely a ripple on the upside down lake of the void sort.

f. Kinkster

4. Would you rather have your enemy eaten by a shark or die in an earthquake getting swallowed up by earth?

Well since sharks need to eat at least some good would come from the demise of my protagonist.

5. For the next year, would you rather be dressed like a mime every day OR look normal but not be allowed to talk?

Normal? I have nothing to say about that concept. I'll get back to you on that this time next year.

Bonus: What’s the most beautiful word in the world?

Antidisestablishmentarianism or Oops. Love em both

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

TMI Tuesday: July 17, 2018

Posted on July 16, 2018by TMI Tuesday blog

Fun and a bit crazy, that is this week’s TMI Tuesday.

It could happen…

1. If each of your index fingers could spew a liquid for the rest of your life, what liquid(s) would it be.

Rainwater and grain alcohol. My cocktail of choice BTW.

2. If you could talk to everyone in the world for 5 minutes, all at once, what would you say?

I would say, "Why don't ya'll dummy up for five minutes and think before you say something from now on." Then I would enjoy the next four minutes and fifty seven seconds of peace before the endless gibberish resumes.

3. Would you rather not be able to eat for a week OR not be able to _____ for a month?

Easy peasy. I would rather not be able to converse with anyone for a month. See answer to number 2. Now let's eat!

4. What exhilarates you?

Eating.

5. What is the best perk of your job? What is the best perk you have ever had at any job?

Having my own office with a big comfy couch and a door that locked.

Bonus:  Just how naughty are you?

Very naughty. Especially when I had my own office with a big comfy couch and a door that locked.

————-

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Tender Tabernacle

When I am inside you I adore running my fingers through the satiny pages of your flowing folds. Running my fingers along the event horizon where my shaft sleekly splits you wide and melds into making us as one. How your body pulses and vibrates when my finger tip presses my moment where your taint starts and my full immersion leads. As my finger trace back around gathering a glistening sheen unable stop until I have encircled my girth. Perfect placement for my thumb to find the very pinnacle of your tender tabernacle. There to give service and pay homage to that nubbin with an ever gentle rubbing. Your blue eyes become bluer. Your blond hair becomes blonder. Golden strands fall before your face and you sigh, then gasp the sweet sigh of release.

Pass Around Joy

1. Packed and Stacked
2. Bev's Flowing Ardor
3. Meanwhile
4. Moke A Joint
5. Nanny Ride
6. Bwana
7. Joy Ride
8. Another Ride

TMI Tuesday: June 12, 2018

Posted on June 11, 2018by TMI Tuesday blog

What do ice-cream and sex have in common? We discuss both this TMI Tuesday, that’s what.

1. If you were an ice-cream flavor, what would you be and why?

Vanilla Berry Swirl; because I l always savor slipping my vanilla bean into a sweet juicy succulent bursting berry and swirling it over under sideways down and around and around until together we churn out something sweet.

2. What are the best sexy skills you bring to a sexual relationship?

My filthy super smooth super smutty super sexy boom boom boomski bedroom talk.

3. What is the single largest problem causing you angst in your romantic relationship (current or most recent relationship)?

Health issues.

4. What is the best part about being in a relationship with you?

Me knowing when not to use my filthy super smooth super smutty super sexy boom boom boomski bedroom talk.

5. What is the biggest misconception that people have about you?

They don't recognize what a googly eyed romantic I am because I tend to keep that to myself

Bonus:  When you look at old photos of yourself, do you like what you see?

My clueless self looking back at me.

————-

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Highly Unlikely

JoJo was the unlikely, as well as the very likely tail end of Tails from Slammies. First impressions are quite often highly skewed and incorrect except for when they are not. For the type of woman you would never peg for a geezer groupie, baby girl resplendent in daddy issues, or grandmother; this tight bodied, tatted up, ageless energetic goofball beauty was a force of nature.


Through the long unfolding of Tails of Slammies, spanning the three sisters of legend: Cathy, Janine, and Peggy, through the incidental drive-by Sindy, JoJo was apropos punctuation.

Vegan Adventures

One minute I'm having a cold brew at Slammies.

Next thing I know I am in JoJo the bartenders bed.

She is stuffing the business end of a Cauliflower floret with an asparagus spear chaser up my rear.

I didn't know she was a vegan.

Just another early 21st century night.

Expectations

Whenever I feel others are not living up to my expectations,

I immediately review my expectations to see if they are still applicable.

Voices

Sometimes I hear a familiar voice and I look up expectantly.

Only to see a young woman.

The realization sets in that the familiar voice was long ago.

While this woman's age is right.

Mine is all wrong.

TMI Tuesday: April 18, 2017

TMI

1d ago

• bed
• blog
• celebrity
• dating
• erotic

Let’s do this–TMI Tuesday.

Sexual Revelations

1. When did you see your first naked women that was not a family member?

On her eighteenth birthday, because anytime before that she would not have qualified as a woman.

2. When did you see your first naked man that was not a family member?

On my eighteenth birthday, because anytime before that I would not have qualified as a man. ( Do I qualify as a family member? But anything before that would have been Freshman High School swimming class and I don not think I have overcome that jolt yet and there were no men in there. Just us lads, which was traumatic enough. )

3. What were the circumstances of each situation?

Stretched out on my bed and in a mirror in that order.

4. At what age did you first witness sexual nudity? Was it online or in print?

When I was nine years old I found a folded up paper on my Grammar School stairway landing which introduced me to the wonderful world of Playboy's Vargas Girl art. More than mere print, it was a gateway to enough unreasonable expectations to last a lifetime.

5. Sexual revolution–When was yours OR It hasn’t happened yet?

In my late twenties when I found out how horny some women in their thirties can be.

Bonus: What’s the best sex advice or sex education book you’ve ever read? (Yes, it must be a book, could be online but a book)

Kama Sutra. I really just read it for the articles. Honest.

————

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Tempest Slacker

Tempest Slacker was sleek. Her genes had clearly spent centuries traversing the four corners of the globe. Never mind the fact that a globe has no corners, her DNA had clearly kept all the best parts of her ancestors global meandering. While the eye of this beholder makes that highly judgmental and subjective observation the laws of symmetry always hold sway to visually processed stimuli. Or so I have heard. Perfection oozed from her pores. Shiny black hair that had never known the cruel blades of a shear made high heels a necessary accessory to keep her perfectly split free silky ends from sweeping the ground when the swishing sashay of her fully follicle obscured behind was in transit.

I alone among men knew the treasure that swayed behind that opaque curtain of hair, and was insanely jealous when ever she tossed her head to tease a peak to strangers left agog in her wake. But I digress. Or at least momentarily regress to my more base instincts until I again transcend myself to maintain my coveted title of human being.

But on this day and in this time it is a trifle trying. Tomorrow will be more so. For tomorrow is the day of days. The day when Tempest and I enter The Teapot Dome and tangle with the Gene Rippers one on one.

TMI Tuesday blog: February 27, 2017

27m ago

• blog
• dating
• erotic
• fantasy
• fetish

Welcome to another edition of TMI Tuesday. Come on and play!

1. Which one of the following do you need increased privacy:

a. Online interaction such as internet search and website interaction

b. Sex

c. Drinking or taking drugs (including marijuana use)

d. Work
Because I have been carrying this same two by four back and forth for the past ten years and if I did not have privacy someone might figure that out.

2. What decade in life were you most happiest with your sex life? Why? For example: teens, 20s, 30s, 40s, etc.

I would have to split that into late twenties and early thirties. I was clicking on all cylinders in ways better than I ever though possible for lil' ol me. Everything was going my way. I would say the decade before that was a build up. The decade after that was a let down. But I have been riding that karma wave ever since.

3. What is the sexiest TV show you have watched in the last year? Why is it sexy to you?

Since memory for me seems to be a thing of the past I will go with what is fresh in my libido and that is the dark retelling of the Wizard of Oz titled "Emerald City". All because of West played by Ana Ularu. She is some kind of wonderful, and all the sexy magic I can handle right now.

4. What sex scene, from a movie, would you like to recreate?

Spending a weekend doing a reenactment of "Last Tango in Paris" et al.  Now go get the butter.

5. Your sex life is to become a reality series. Which of the following titles best fits:

a. “Too Big To Fail”

b. “Years of Solitude”

But when that damn bursts it gets all over everything and everybody. I would prefer the title:  "Boom and Bust - Rinse and Re- Pete A Trilogy "

c. “A Visual Guide for the Perplexed”

d. “Yes please, Any Time and Anywhere”

Bonus: The Late Phoenix would like to know your family’s secret recipes because he is hungry and thirsty all the time. Please share.

The only family recipe I have is for Disaster so I will do you a solid and spare you that step by step descent in to hell. Besides which I think most people have their very own secret family recipe for that morsel.

————

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

About TMI Tuesday blog

follow on twitter: http://twitter.com/tmituesdayblog

View all posts by TMI Tuesday blog →